Tweaks To The Not-Yogurt

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I’ve experimented a couple of times with the ingredients for the not-yogurt. The last four batches have been great – thick and creamy through-and-through, with no runny stuff to pour off or mix in, and no cottage-cheese chunks. So here’s my current process:

I make just over two quarts at a time. I prefer to mix, incubate and store without changing containers, so I use these 32-oz. cups for the NutriBullet. I ordered four of them from Amazon.

I divide two quarts of organic half-and-half into three of the 32-oz. cups, then add a little more until I’ve reached the Max line. Next I add two tablespoons of yogurt from the previous batch to each cup. Then I crush one additional BioGaia tablet for each cup.

That may not be necessary, of course. Could be the previous yogurt is all it takes. But what the heck, I’m doing this to make sure I get the L. reuteri into my system, so I’m willing to use three tablets per batch. Perhaps I’ll experiment with some future batch and skip the additional tablet for one of the three cups, then compare the results.

Someone mentioned in comments that if the not-yogurt is runny, it likely means the bacteria ran out of food during incubation. Well, we mustn’t let that happen. Potato starch is dirt cheap, and I’d rather give the bacteria too much food instead of too little. So I add two full tablespoons of potato starch to each cup. Haven’t had a runny batch since I started doing that.

Sometimes when we reach the bottom of a cup, there’s a thick, white layer.  I assume it’s mostly leftover potato starch the little critters didn’t eat. Since potato starch is a probiotic (don’t let the word starch scare you), I just scoop it out and add it to my yogurt shake.

Once all the ingredients are in the cup, I plop it on the NutriBullet to mix everything – no need to make a slurry first. Then I cover each cup with a coffee filter held in place by a rubber band. Then it’s off to the Sous Vide pot to incubate for at least 36 hours.

I took a picture of the not-yogurt after a recent batch was fully incubated, then realized it just looked like a cup of cream. To demonstrate how thick this stuff is, I plunged a butter knife into the yogurt, then took another picture.

Now that’s thick.

When we finish off two of the cups, I open the third cup and spoon out what I need to start another batch. That seems to work out well as far as timing. The next batch is done just about the time we reach the bottom of that third cup.

How are the rest of you doing with your batches?


From The News …

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Items from my inbox and elsewhere ….


You probably noticed (at least I hope you noticed) I haven’t posted for a while. We ended up taking a brief vacation to visit my family in Illinois. It was good to get away and visit with my mom, The Older Brother, his kids and grandkids, and my son Zack. It was also good not think about work or blogging or much of anything else for few days.

I was mentally lazy but physically active. On Saturday I played nine holes of golf with The Older Brother’s sons Eric and Grant. On Sunday, The Older Brother joined us for 18 holes. It was something of a belated sendoff to my dad. We played his favorite course and talked about him several times … partly because of what The Older Brother called Operation Ashes or something like that.

My dad was an avid golfer. He loved the game, but it didn’t love him back. He played as often as he could, but never developed a reliable swing. When I was kid, the bookshelves were full of books on how to play better golf, and the basement was full of golf clubs my dad had abandoned in a fruitless quest to find clubs that would swing themselves properly.

He would have loved it if The Older Brother and I had shown some interest in the game when we were kids. We didn’t. I didn’t start playing until I was nearly 30, and The Older Brother plays perhaps one round per year. But after I did take up the game, I spent a lot of weekend afternoons on that golf course with Dad. Those are some of my fondest memories.

The 17th hole was Dad’s nemesis … well, one of them. It’s a par three with a narrow fairway surrounded on both sides by water. Sand traps in front of the green shrink the fairway to a ribbon. If your tee shot doesn’t land on the green, you’re probably in trouble.

Dad’s tee shots often found the water. More than once, he turned to me after the splash and said, “When I die, dump my ashes in the water hazard on this hole so I can spend eternity with my golf balls.”

Operation Ashes was to honor that request.

He would have loved seeing the four of us out there, playing a round of golf together. My nephew Eric (who posted the now-famous Fat Head Pizza recipe) swats the ball like a pro. He hits the longest, straightest drives I’ve ever seen from an amateur. His leisurely backswing is a thing of beauty. It reminds me of what Bob Hope once said about Bing Crosby: “You can measure him for a suit during his backswing.”

My nephew Grant (who re-ignited my long-dormant interest in golf during his recent visit) is no slouch himself, despite only taking up the game a few years ago. Fortunately, The Older Brother and I ensured that slouches weren’t underrepresented in the foursome. We admired Eric’s and Grant’s shots, then saw to it that the local kids who sell golf balls they find out of bounds remain gainfully employed.

As we were approaching that dastardly 17th hole (it’s now the eighth hole because the front and back nines were flipped), The Older Brother’s Youngest Son Kenny joined us. We each took some of Dad’s ashes and poured them into the murky water. Mission accomplished.

With the little ceremony finished, Eric and Grant hit high, lovely tee shots that landed on the green. I chunked my tee shot, but the ball landed on that narrow strip of fairway in front of the green, bounced, and rolled on. Then The Older Brother pulled his tee shot into the water. Splash. Well, someone had to pay homage to Dad.

On Monday, I played 18 holes of disc golf at the local college course with Grant and Sara while Chareva and Alana baby-sat with Grant’s son. Then we finally headed back to Tennessee. As you might suspect, I was pretty worn out by the time we got home. On the other hand, I’m happy to be 60 years old and still able to engage in so much physical activity over a weekend.

I’m resistant to sunburn but not immune

Nine holes of golf, then 18 holes of golf, then an outdoor “Family Fun Day” at an Elks Club by the lake, then 18 holes of disc golf, with most of that time spent in the sun. Back in the day, I would gotten completely fried without sunscreen. I didn’t get fried, but my arms and legs finally went from browned to red. Turns out I’m not quite immune to prolonged sun exposure. The good news is that the redness is fading and I show no signs of peeling. Perhaps healthier skin not only doesn’t burn as easily, it recovers more easily when it is burned.

Scientists are freakin’ liars

A clinical study came out last year that compared people assigned to vegan, low-fat and low-carb diets. The conclusion? Low-fat diets are best for cardiovascular health – in fact, low-carb diets increase cardiovascular risk. Here’s part of the abstract:

One-year body mass changes did not differ by diet. One-year lowered-carbohydrate diet significantly increases cardiovascular risks, while a low-to-moderate-fat diet significantly reduces cardiovascular risk factors.

One of the authors was Keith Ayoob, who I refer to as Ayoob The Boob because he champions the arterycloggingsaturatefat! theory, commenting to the media that coconut oil is bad for us and other such nonsense.

So what do we make of a study like this? Turns out we shouldn’t make much of it at all. If you go to the listing for the study on, you’ll find this:

The above article from Clinical Cardiology, posted online on September 27, 2018 in Wiley Online Library (, has been retracted by agreement between the journal Editor in Chief, A. John Camm and Wiley Periodicals, Inc. The article has been withdrawn due to concerns with data integrity and an undisclosed conflict of interest by the lead author.

Concerns with data integrity … yeah, that tells us all we need to know.

Sorry if I’m typing slowly … I have Avocado Hand

Yeah, I never heard of it either. But according to CBS News, Avocado Hand is a growing problem:

The number of injuries caused by improper handling and cutting of avocados is on the rise. The U.K. newspaper The Times reports that the British Association of Plastic, Reconstructive and Aesthetic Surgeons is seeing a growing number of patients in the emergency room as a result of “avocado hand” – injuries from failed attempts to cut an avocado.

What the heck is wrong with those Brits? They can’t slice up an avocado without severing a finger? Must have something to do with all those years of sticking out a pinky while drinking tea.

Stateside, doctors say they’re seeing a similar trend.

Oh. Sorry, Brits.

A flurry of social media posts have emerged with people sharing their own tales of avocado hand injuries.

Excellent. Because people just don’t share enough stupid @#$% about themselves on social media.

Experts recommend against cutting an avocado while holding it in your hand; instead, slice into it on a cutting board.

That seems rather obvious … but it’s nice to know our big, beautiful world contains experts in how to cut an avocado.

What kind of nuts write these laws?

In Fat Head, Reason Magazine editor and writer Jacob Sullum pointed out that regulations are often based on the belief that most people are stupid. A recent article in the U.K. Daily Mail provides a rather nice example of that belief in action:

Health and safety rules have been ridiculed after a brand of peanut butter was withdrawn because the jar does not warn it contains nuts.

The Whole Earth product is called ‘3 Nut Butter’ and makes plain on the front of the label that it contains walnuts and pecans as well as peanuts.

But thousands of the £2.50 jars, available in major supermarkets such as Tesco, are being recalled because they breach rules which state there has to be a nut allergy warning in English on the jar.

The article includes a picture of the jar. It’s right there on the label for everyone to see: 3 Nut Butter. Peanut, Pecan & Walnut. So apparently the regulatory goofballs want another label that reads: Warning! This product, which is clearly made of peanuts, pecans and walnuts, CONTAINS NUTS.

As do many government agencies.

What kind of boobs write these laws?

Here’s a bit from my old standup act about the day Sara was born:

Women have been breast-feeding for hundreds of thousands of years, but nowadays when you have a baby, the hospital sends in a breast-feeding consultant. Someone to sit there and watch and make sure Mom knows how to do it.

Well, I dunno, the guy did seem to know what he was talking about. We never got those pictures he promised us; that was kind of disappointing.

Okay, that didn’t actually happen, but the hospital did send in a lactation consultant. Didn’t occur to me to ask if she was licensed. Frankly, I don’t care if she was licensed. But the boobs in government do:

More than a quarter of American professions require a license, compared to just one-twentieth in the ’50s.

Well, you all remember how millions of Americans died in the ‘50s because of unlicensed service providers, don’t you? Something had to be done.

For fiscal conservatives, it’s a sign of the growing crawl of government into the pocketbooks of citizens trying to make a living, leading to such bizarre outcomes as hair braiders requiring more training hours than EMTs.

Well, you all remember how millions of Americans used to die from bad hair braids, don’t you? Something had to be done.

The next policy battleground? Breastfeeding. Starting last month, the Peach State found itself with a shortage of lactation consultants. That’s because two years ago, the Republican-controlled state legislature passed a law requiring all experts to complete 14 college courses in health science, 90 hours of breastfeeding education and 1,000 clinical hours, as well as pass a written exam.

When the lactation consultant visited Chareva, it took her roughly 10 minutes to say all she had to say. I can certainly see how 14 college courses in health science, 90 hours of breastfeeding education, a thousand hours of clinical work and a written exam would be necessary. You all remember the days when millions of American newborns died because their mothers couldn’t figure out how to stick the kid on a boob, don’t you?

States are often called the laboratories of democracy for good reason, but few see them as testing grounds for nursing a newborn. Yet that’s what states like Georgia are becoming with the decision to police a profession that operated “just fine” untouched, says Buzz Brockway, a state legislator who voted against the law during the 2015–16 session.

In this case, Brockway didn’t see evidence of bad breastfeeding tips leading to illness or death. In fact, the legislation was not driven by cases of dire outcomes from sketchy breastfeeding advice.

No kidding. So here’s the real reason the law was passed:

The main beneficiaries of the legislation are universities that provide general health courses and now get a new customer base, as well as the International Board of Lactation Consultant Examiners (IBLCE), which became the only certification group legally allowed to issue licenses in Georgia. The board generates hundreds of dollars per applicant in examination fees.

With this kind of nonsense coming from legislators, next thing you know, they’ll be passing laws saying you need a license to give nutrition advice. No, wait …

What kind of boobs … boobs … boobs … sorry, I was just getting myself into a positive mindset

The New York Post published an article on how men can live longer. Avoid processed carbs and get some exercise, you say? Nope. Here’s the top suggestion:

1. Stare at boobs

It may seem like an inconvenience or an invasion of privacy to many women, but staring at boobs creates a positive mindset in men.

I’m a very positive person. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

The same effect occurs when they look at cute animals.

Well, if I have to choose …

A 2012 study, published in the Archives of Internal Medicine, looked at the effects positive thinking had on men’s health. After a year, positive thinking had a powerful effect on health choices.

Uh … I’m still not seeing the connection between living longer and staring at boobs.

More than half of the patients with coronary artery disease increased their physical activity versus 37 percent in the control group, who were not asked to write down positive thoughts in the morning.

Ah, I see. A guy stares at boobs, and this puts him in a positive mindset. Then, because of the boob-induced positive mindset, he gets up the next morning and writes down positive thoughts (perhaps about boobs), which in turn prompts him to become more physically active.

Let me write down a positive thought of my own: I’m positive if I take up staring at boobs and tell Chareva I’m just trying to extend my lifespan, my lifespan will be in danger of ending shortly thereafter.

By the way, the other suggestions for men on how to live longer were, in order: have lots of sex, get married, have kids, be responsible, and get a “dad bod.”

Sex, marriage, kids, responsibilities … yeah, that’s what happens when you stare at boobs.


Dogs Need Grains? Here We Go Again … With Commentary From My Dog

The FDA recently released a report linking grain-free dog food to a rare heart condition in dogs. Some people on Twitter have suggested the real problem is the pea protein in grain-free dog food.

Frankly, I doubt pea proteins are worse than grains for dogs. This is just another lousy observational study (if you can even call it a study) with a huge confounder, as I explain in the video below. The Save The Grains Campaign of course insists this proves dogs need grains – just like people! My dog Misha comments on that in the video a well. Transcript below.


Hello, I’m Tom Naughton, and this is the Fat Head Report.

Well, it looks like the save the grains campaign is expanding into new markets.

As we’ve seen before, the save the grains campaign is the grain industry’s ongoing PR effort to convince us if we don’t eat grains, we’ll get sick and die.

Since human beings didn’t eat grains for more than 99 percent of our time on earth, the idea that we need grains to be healthy is, of course, ridiculous.

But you know what’s even more ridiculous? The idea that our dogs need grains to be healthy too. But that’s what some scientists are trying to tell us.

According to the New York Times, the FDA has reported that 560 dogs have been diagnosed with a rare heart condition called dilated cardiomyopathy. And wouldn’t you know it, a high proportion of those dogs were fed grain-free dog food.

Well, if grain-free dog food is correlated with a rare heart condition, then these dogs must have developed heart disease because they didn’t eat grains, right?

No. Of course not. This is another example of why we shouldn’t jump to conclusions based on observational studies. Because there’s a perfectly logical explanation for this correlation.

People with high disposable incomes are much more likely to go to a vet and pay for an expensive test to find out Fido has a rare heart condition. Which is exactly what happened here. The heart condition was reported to the FDA by people who own the dogs.

People with high disposable incomes are also more likely to feed their dogs grain-free dog food. Because it’s expensive.

So when a rare heart condition is diagnosed in 560 dogs, out of 70 million dogs by the way, it’s no surprise that more of those dogs were eating expensive dog food.

And yet the perfectly logical explanation didn’t seem to occur to the expert the New York Times quoted for the article. He seems to think dogs actually need grains. And here’s his explanation:

“If they look at the dogs’ relatives in the wild, like coyotes, wolves and hyenas, they live on their prey. Those animals they prey on are typically herbivores, so they are ingesting grains anyway.”

First off, that’s like saying since I eat cows and the cows eat grass, I should just eat the grass myself and cut out the middleman. Or middle moo.

And second, it’s just not true. And here to explain is my own expert: my dog Misha, who’s almost eight years old, and his been living her entire life on a diet that consists mostly of raw meat. Misha, what about this idea that coyotes and wolves live on animals that eat grains?

Misha: I looked up what my relatives in the wild eat. They eat deer, bison, moose, elk, caribou and small animals like rabbits and rodents. Then I look up what those animals eat. They eat grass, twigs, roots, tree buds, flowers and insects. None of these yummy animals live on grains.

Now, as I’ve already explained, we don’t feed you any grains at all. What would you say is the biggest health problem you’ve experienced because of that diet?

Misha: Nothing. I feel great.

And so what would you say about this whole notion that dogs need grains to be healthy?

Misha: It’s a pile of dog poop.

Couldn’t have said it better myself.


Letters From Viewers

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It’s been ages since I posted a viewer email.  This one arrived yesterday and relates in part to a recent post, so here it is:


Hey Tom,

Just wanted to write you a thank you for the things you do. You have helped me and my family.

I recently bought Fat Head Kids, mainly for myself (I’m a 28 year old dad with two daughters) and the advice has really helped! I’ve been losing weight, I feel better and I definitely look better!

That’s not all though. Not even close. I have lived my whole life with awful eczema, asthma, and lactose intolerance. My eczema can get so bad it has lead to depression in the past, something I’m not prone to. I once had it so bad that when I would turn my neck the skin would crack and bleed. The few times it’s improved is when I’ve been in tropical climates for awhile, but unfortunately I live in a dry desert.

While switching my diet didn’t heal it, it remarkably improved a ton! In fact I had a bit of breaded chicken from the store the other day and almost immediately my skin flared up. I couldn’t believe I never noticed this before! I think it’s a combination of getting rid of polyunsaturated fats as well as grains. I’ve gotten rid of just grains and sugars before but never had this improvement. I think the fats are a big difference.

I wanted to share an experience with you though. Years ago I lived in Mexico for a little while. My family is from Sweden so I have rather fair skin. In fact when I first moved to Mexico the locals called me “transparent” as a nickname because they said I definitely wasn’t white.

Anyway, I spent most of my time outside in Mexico and eating with the Mexican people. To my surprise I never burned, not once, my skin was at its best but I attributed that to the climate.

Most of my meals there were soups with chicken legs, or cow stomach, also beef, fruits, vegetables. The only thing we had often that wouldn’t be allowed with my current diet is of course the corn tortillas. Almost all food was cooked in lard from a local butcher shop.

When I moved back to the states I can remember thinking “Oh good my skin doesn’t burn now that I’m older” and being in for a nasty surprise when my first summer back I ended up completely sunburned. I was stunned, why was the Mexican sun so different?

Well, I recently read your post on sunscreen and now it makes sense. This summer since switching my diet I no longer burn. I can’t believe it was this easy. You honestly have probably saved me from skin cancer.

I’m still looking at ways to improve my health. I’ll likely follow the Undoctored protocol after reading your recent posts on that. I wonder if that is a big part of my eczema.

But I just wanted to say thanks, I never realized my body and life in turn could be so great.

Hope you’re having a good day on your farm.



So glad to hear your eczema has improved, Nils. I’ve been in the Tennessee summer sun for two-hour stretches several times recently without turning red at all, so yes, I believe consuming natural fats makes a huge difference.

I’d definitely give the Undoctored protocol a shot. My recent experiences have reminded me that if the gut microbiome is messed up, all kind of health problems can flare up.

I’m also glad to hear you bought Fat Head Kids for yourself as much as for your kids. We’ve had several adults tells us they learned quite a bit from it.  Best to you and your family.



More On Gut Bugs And The ‘Not-Yogurt’

I had additional thoughts when I wrote the previous post about the Undoctored advice from Dr. William Davis that solved my health annoyances. I didn’t include them because the post was already lengthy. But since the post sparked quite a few comments here and on Twitter, here are those additional thoughts in no particular order.

Technically, it’s not yogurt.

Someone here or on Twitter asked if it’s possible to buy the L. reuteri yogurt in stores. No, because as Dr. Davis explains in this post, it’s not technically yogurt and can’t be labeled as such:

To call something “yogurt,” by (semi-arbitrary) FDA guidelines, it must be fermented by the microorganisms Lactobacillus bulgaricus and Streptococcus thermophilus (unspecified strains). It can contain other fermenting species such as Lactobacillus acidophilus or Bifidobacteria species, but it must contains the first two species in order to be labeled “yogurt.” So our L. reuteri “yogurt,” if this were being sold commercially, could not be labeled as such because it was not fermented with Lactobacillus bulgaricus or Streptococcus thermophilus.

You won’t find it in stores, but trust me, once you make a batch you’ll wonder why you ever thought it would be difficult.

There are benefits besides battling fungal overgrowth.

I was motivated to try the not-technically-yogurt as a means of beating back a fungal overgrowth that was causing those health annoyances. Mission accomplished. But I’ve noticed other benefits as well. My sleep is deep and restful. I have long, complex, vivid dreams. I feel fully awake sooner after getting out of bed, and don’t require as much coffee to feel human. I’ve had occasional bouts of insomnia my entire adult life, and I still get them now and then. But I don’t feel as exhausted when I don’t sleep well.

When I do sleep well, I feel amazingly awake during the day. Like AWAKE! awake, very clear-headed and energetic.

Dr. Davis mentioned in his post that people eating the yogurt have reported a number of benefits: smoother skin (including fewer wrinkles), increased muscle mass, a rise in testosterone, weight loss, etc.

I don’t know what accomplished what.

If I’d been conducting N=1 experiments, I suppose I would have started with the CandiBactin and tracked my results, then tried the yogurt without the CandiBactin and tracked them again. I began taking the CandiBactin and making the yogurt at the same time, so I can’t say how much either had to do with the improvements. I can say it was a very effective combination.

I’ve been reminded of why I need to seed and feed the good gut bacteria.

We had a chapter on feeding the good gut bugs in the Fat Head Kids book and film. (The book of course goes into more detail than the film.) I shouldn’t have needed reminding. But I guess I did … and it turns out drinking Kombucha now and then isn’t enough.

Dr. Davis told me on the phone he’s not very popular in low-carb and keto circles these days because he insists we need to eat foods that feed the gut bacteria. That means fibers – which doesn’t go over well with the We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Fibers! people, some of whom now consider him a heretic. That’s a shame, because he promotes low-carb diets and even ketogenic diets. He just doesn’t want us to go zero-carb and stay there for months on end.  He believes that can lead to gut dysbiosis.

If you’re on an all-animal-foods diet devoid of fibers and are experiencing nothing but benefits, good for you. I hope the benefits keep on keeping on.

But I noticed several people here and on Twitter commented that they’ve experienced symptoms similar to mine. So perhaps the points Dr. Davis makes in this video are worth considering:

Keep in mind, he didn’t form his opinions just by reading research. He’s been actively treating and counseling people for years. On the phone, he told me he’s seen the same pattern over and over: overweight person goes strict low-carb or keto, and everything improves. Weight goes down, energy goes up, labs move in the right direction. Then a year or two or three later, things start slowly going south again. The weight starts creeping back on, the labs move in the wrong direction, and health problems begin to appear – like, say, mysterious itchy patches on the skin, or something that feels like a prostate-colon-whatever infection. Dr. Davis believes the backsliding is the result of inadvertently starving out the good gut bugs.

After seeing how quickly my health annoyances began to fade after following his advice, I plan to be much more vigilant about seeding and feeding the good gut bugs.

It’s not necessary to significantly increase the carbs, by the way. Like I said in my previous post, I feed the gut bugs by stirring the prebiotic mix from Gut Garden into my yogurt shake. Back when I first tried the prebiotic mix, I simply stirred it into water and drank it. I tested my blood-sugar reaction afterwards a couple of times and found my glucose level barely budged. Seems likely you could stay in ketosis if that’s your goal.

As I wrote in the previous post, my cholesterol and triglycerides were higher than usual when I had them tested some months ago. I forgot to mention I also got a fasting insulin test: 10.5 uIU/mL, which is considered moderately insulin resist, and much higher than I’d like, regardless of how it’s classified. I don’t know if that’s gone up recently because I’ve never had the test before.

After I’ve continued this program for another couple of months, I plan to get all those lab tests done again. I’ll let you know the results.


I Got Undoctored On The Way To The Undoctored Mastermind Seminar

Some weeks ago, Dr. William “Wheat Belly” Davis asked if I’d give a lunchtime speech at the Undoctored Mastermind seminar he’s conducting on August 24th. I of course agreed immediately because I’m huge fan of his work, not to mention the Undoctored book itself.

As if I needed any more convincing just how valuable Dr. Davis’ work is, he undoctored me with some advice that solved several long-running health annoyances.

Okay, yes, Davis is a doctor – a cardiologist, to be specific. But he’s the Undoctored doctor because he thinks way beyond the standard treatments of drugs and surgery. He looks for root causes and natural cures. He encourages people to do their own research, get their own tests done, and generally take control of their health themselves instead of relying on The Great White Coats.

Let me back up and talk about those long-running health annoyances. I haven’t written about them previously because I figured it would be more useful to wait until I had an explanation for what caused them. Now I do. We’ll get to that later.

As you may recall, I went in for surgery a year and half ago to shave down a bone spur in my left shoulder. When I woke from the anesthesia, I was told my bicep tendon had been severed by the spur and had to be reattached. That led to weeks of inactivity, sleeping sitting up with my arm pinned to my side, followed by months of physical therapy, slowly regaining the strength in my left arm.

I was (and still am) grateful to live in an age where these kinds of injuries can be fixed with arthroscopic surgery.  But shortly after the surgery, I began experiencing a string of health annoyances. (I call them annoyances because they weren’t severe … just annoying as hell.)

The annoyances began with what felt like a bladder infection. I scheduled an appointment with our GP and saw a nurse practitioner, who had me leave a urine sample.

Good news! a nurse informed me later over the phone. The tests came back negative. You don’t have a bladder infection.

Ah, I see. The tests came back negative, so I’m fine and there’s no problem … except it still feels like I have a bladder infection.

The discomfort in that general area grew worse, so the GP referred me to a urologist. I explained that I sometimes felt like I had to pee when I didn’t. Sometimes there was pain that felt way down deep somewhere. Oh and by the way, I’ve started having occasional bouts of diarrhea for no apparent reason.

The urologist conducted some tests (one of which involved a glove … that’s all I’ll say about that) and told me my prostate was enlarged and likely inflamed. Probably an infection, he said, and prescribed CIPRO.

I felt better for a couple of weeks after the CIPRO. Then all the symptoms returned. Then they got worse.  During a follow-up visit, the urologist told me the prostate tends to get larger over time, so it’s not at all unusual for men my age to have the symptoms of an enlarged prostate.

Uh, yeah, okay … but these symptoms didn’t creep on up me over the years. They came on all at once. I didn’t age 10 years in the past few weeks.

He sent me for some kind of scan that confirmed my prostate was enlarged. How is that useful? I wondered. We already knew that.  After reviewing the results, the urologist prescribed Flowmax. I took it for one day and threw the rest in the trash because it made me feel hungover all day.

Meanwhile, I went to see a gastroenterologist. I was due for a colonoscopy anyway (my dad had colon cancer, so I get checked every few years) and told him about the occasional bouts of diarrhea. He said he’d run some tests on tissue samples he’d collect during the colonoscopy.

At the follow-up, he informed me I had no cancer and no polyps, but tests showed I had microscopic colitis.

What causes that? I asked.

We don’t know, he told me. Here’s a prescription for a ridiculously expensive drug to treat the colitis and the diarrhea. Or you could just take large doses of Pepto-Bismol.

I went with the cheaper option. The diarrhea eventually went away. In the meantime, I asked the urologist if the inflamed prostate could be the result of an inflamed colon. Yes, he said, that’s entirely possible.

What the @#$%? I wondered. What is going on down there?

Because I had skin cancer on my back in my 30s, I see a dermatologist for a check-up every 18 months or so. Shortly before I was due to see her, I developed an itchy patch on my back. During the appointment, she told me it was a fungal infection. She prescribed a cream to treat it. The cream sort of worked, but the itchy patch tended to flare up now and then.

Then I got what felt like the same itch in my right ear. Some days it was barely there, but on other days, I was constantly poking my pinkie in there and trying to scratch it.

Back to the dermatologist. She examined the ear and said it was the same kind of fungal infection. Use the same cream and it should go away.

But it didn’t go away. It came and went, like the patch on my back.

Around the same time, I decided to get an NMR Lipoprofile and a coronary calcium test to convince my GP I don’t have heart disease and don’t need a statin for my “high” cholesterol. As you may recall, the calcium score came back at zero. The lipoprofile also showed I produce large, fluffy LDL almost exclusively.

I expected all that. The GP was delighted with the zero on the calcium test and had his nurse call to tell me to keep doing whatever I’m doing.

But I was a bit surprised to see my total cholesterol was up to 280. It’s been in the 205-225 range for years. I was more surprised to see my triglycerides were at 125. That’s considered in the normal range by the medical establishment, but I haven’t had triglycerides over 75 in at least 10 years. I began to wonder if all this stuff was related somehow. Was my cholesterol going up as a reaction to the infected prostate-colon-whatever issue?

Meanwhile, as I was trying to figure it all out, I started gaining weight. Over the course of several weeks, I went from 200 or so to 212 on the gym scale – on basically the same lowish-carb diet I’ve had for years.

Well, no problem, I thought. I’ve shed the pounds before when I needed to. I know what to do.

I followed Dr. Ted Naiman’s program of high protein to non-protein grams. I also limited myself to around 2,000 calories per day. Yeah, that should do it …

Two weeks later, I stepped on the scale at the gym: 212 pounds.

What the @#$%!!

Okay, I’ll stick to the same diet, but eliminate all dairy products. I never needed to eliminate dairy before, but I know it works for some people. I’ll also limit myself to an eight-hour eating window.

Two weeks later, I stepped on the scale at the gym: 212 pounds.

What the @#$%ity-@#$%!!

Well, perhaps it’s time to try that meat-only diet everyone’s talking about. People have reported dramatic weight loss – even people who didn’t lose much weight just by restricting carbs. Yeah, I’ll try that, and also make sure I put in more sessions on the treadmill.

Two weeks later, I stepped on the scale at the gym: 214 pounds.

What the @#$% (reaches over shoulder to scratch back) is going on (uses pinkie to scratch inside right ear) inside my body?! (Shifts in chair because of discomfort in nether regions, then gets up to answer a false-alarm feeling of needing to urinate.)

When Dr. Davis got in touch to ask about giving a speech at the Undoctored Mastermind session, I asked if he had any idea what was going on with me. Oh yes, he had some ideas. He had me send him all my lab work. Then he called.

He explained that every one of my health annoyances was likely the result of small intestine bacterial overgrowth (SIBO), or a fungal overgrowth in the gut, or both. The itchy spots on my back and in my ear? Fungus growing in the gut and likely being excreted onto my skin. The prostate-colon-whatever infection and the resulting discomfort? Probably fungus, certainly some form of gut dysbiosis – and the CIPRO likely made it worse. A fungal overgrowth can trigger weight gain and make the fat difficult to lose, he said. It can also drive up cholesterol and triglycerides.

None of the doctors I visited on this long and winding road suggested anything of the sort. Discomfort in the prostate area? Take these pills. Colon inflamed? Take these pills. Itchy patches on your back and in your ear? Apply this cream. They all treated symptoms. Only the Undoctored doctor suggested a root cause.

He also suggested a treatment plan. He told me to go to Amazon and order two types of CandiBactin (AR and BR) – natural antibiotics to treat the fungal overgrowth. He also reminded me that he posted a recipe on the Wheat Belly Blog for Lactobacillus reuteri yogurt – a yogurt that amplifies the pill form of Lactobacillus reuteri. There are apparently numerous benefits of this particular probiotic strain, which you can read about in the post, but of course my main interest was in getting my gut microbiome healed – probably for the first time since the shoulder/bicep surgery.

Okay, I admit it: I’d read his post about the yogurt before. I even thought it sounded like a good idea. I just didn’t bother making the stuff because I assumed the process was difficult, or time-consuming, or something.

Turns out making the yogurt is quite easy. Chareva and I are on our fourth batch, and we love it. It’s creamy and delicious. Rather than pour off all the liquid when a batch is finished to end up with thick yogurt, we pour off some and then stir in the rest so it’s more like a yogurt shake.

I mix mine up with a few blueberries, some collagen, and some Gut Garden prebiotic blend (potato starch, glucomannan, acacia senegal powder and inulin) to make sure I’m feeding those L. reuteri suckers once they’re in my system.

Here’s our latest batch of yogurt being incubated in a sous vide pot at 100 degrees.

The incubation time is 36 hours, so we start a new batch before finishing the previous batch. That’s longer and at a lower temperature than you’ll find in most yogurt recipes, but as Dr. Davis explains, higher temperatures can kill the L. reuteri bacteria, which would defeat the purpose of making the yogurt.

(When one of Sara’s friends found out we make our own yogurt, she said, “Your parents are kind of hipsters, aren’t they?” I’m pretty sure I’m not hipster. Neither is my wife Moon Baby … I mean, Chareva.)

I’ve been following this program for a few weeks now. The itchy spots on my back and in my ear are gone. The discomfort in my prostate/colon area is also gone. The urge to pee when I don’t actually have to pee is gone.

The weight is finally starting to budge too. After weeks of gaining or failing to lose, I’m down four pounds. Keep that in mind if you’re tempted to tell someone who can’t lose weight it’s because he’s not eating enough fat, or eating too many carbs, or eating too much protein, or not enough protein, or not sticking to a fasting window, etc., etc. I tried and failed to lose weight on diets that worked for me in the past and diets that have worked for other people. It appears in my case it came down to a fungal infection, not a failure to adopt the right macro ratios.

I was flattered when Dr. Davis asked me to speak at the Undoctored Mastermind event. Now that I’ve personally experienced how his approach can turn around a slew of what other doctors treated as separate health issues, I’m not so much flattered as honored to be included in the program.

Thank you, Dr. Davis. I’m lucky I had access to your extensive knowledge.