(SFX: A boulder rolled away)
GROK: Honey, I’m in da’ cave!
MANA: Home. We call it home now. “Honey, I’m home.”
GROK: Right, right. Sorry, I – Wow! You made animals on the wall!
MANA: I call it “painting.” Hope you don’t mind, I used up the berries.
GROK: No, it’s a lovely surprise. And I have a surprise for you, too. Here!
MANA: What are those?
GROK: All the men are doing it now. I didn’t want to be the last man to catch on, you know, like when everyone around here started … aaah, what’s that thing we do sometimes now? You know, before we —
GROK: Right, kissing. Anyway, after we killed the mastodon, Old Baka said, “It’s been a long hunt, men, and we don’t smell so good. Better bring the women some flowers, or there won’t be any children next year.”
MANA: That’s nice. But they don’t really look like flowers.
GROK: Well … no. When Old Baka said that, I was squatting behind a bush, and the other men picked all the flowers. So I grabbed some of this tall grass the birds were eating. See, there’s a little bit of a flower on the top. I call it a “what.”
GROK: Yes, that’s right.
MANA: No, I mean, you can’t call it “what.” We use that word already … what’s this, what’s that, what’s for dinner.
GROK: Oh, I see. Uh … How about “wheat”?
MANA: You have a wonderful mind. Should I put the wheat in some water?
GROK: I was thinking maybe we could eat some of it. Like the birds. They sing really nice.
MANA: Well, mastodon takes forever to cook, and I am a little hungry.
GROK: And you used all your berries to paint.
MANA: Yes. I call myself a “starving artist.” It makes me feel special and gifted beyond my actual abilities.
GROK: Uh … right … so you still want to eat what?
MANA: Never mind. Yes, let’s try the wheat.
(SFX: munching, then gagging and spitting)
MANA: Yeeeuk! Birds are stupid! Wheat tastes terrible.
GROK: And it made my belly hurt! Stupid wheat!
(SFX: A club pounds away, BAM! BAM! BAM!)
MANA: Look at that. You beat it into a pile of dirt. I mean, it’s sort of like dirt, except it’s kind of pretty.
GROK: It is, now that you mention it. I think I’ll call this wheat-dirt “flower.”
MANA: I have an idea! Let’s mix the flower with some water and a little bear fat. Maybe it’ll taste better.
GROK: I’ll get a bowl.
(SFX: pouring, stirring, then swallowing)
GROK: Mmm! That’s not bad!
MANA: It’s delicious! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
GROK: Why are you laughing? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
MANA: I don’t know. I just feel all happy and silly! Like after eating honey! Ha-ha-ha-ha!
GROK: So do I! Ha-ha-ha-ha!
MANA: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! – oh … Wait a minute. I don’t feel so good.
GROK: Me neither. I feel kind of sleepy. Like after the kissing.
MANA: What should we do?
GROK: We probably should eat more flower.
(SFX: Pounding, pouring, stirring, then swallowing)
GROK: Mmm-mmm! That’s better! I feel good again.
(SFX: two small pings, off the stone floor )
GROK: What was that?
MANA: Two of your teeth fell out.
GROK: Hmmm… How do I look?
MANA: Somewhat less intelligent. I’m not sure why.
GROK: Good thing the flower is soft and easy to chew. Get me a little more, would you?
MANA: Sure, why not?
(SFX: shuffling, creaking)
GROK: Why are you moving like a turtle?
MANA: It’s strange … my bones hurt. Like that old man, Artur.
GROK: Well then, we should call what you’re feeling “Artur-itis.”
MANA: Call it whatever you want, but get your own flower. I need to sit down.
MANA: And get me some, too. I want to feel happy and silly again.
GROK: Right. Good idea. We should eat more flower and feel silly and happy.
MANA: So stand up and go get the flower, already!
GROK: I am standing up!
MANA: Oh! Uh … Grok … you’re not as tall as I remember.
GROK: I kind of thought my deerskin was dragging on the floor.
MANA: And my deerskin feels tight around the middle.
GROK: Yes, I noticed. I was afraid you were hibernating.
MANA: You’re getting shorter, and I’m getting fatter. What should we do?
GROK: Well … let’s have some flower so we can be happy while we think about it.
MANA: Good idea.
(SFX: Pounding, pouring, stirring)
GROK: Here! I made extra!
MANA: Mmm! So good!
GROK: Mmmm! Mmm-mmm – aaaah!
MANA: What’s wrong?
GROK: My eyes and my throat hurt. They’re dry, like dirt!
(SFX: Grok taking short, painful breaths through clenched teeth.)
GROK: Why are you laughing?! This hurts!
MANA: I can’t help it; it’s funny. You’re in pain, but it looks like you’re grinning. We should call this “Show Grins” disease.
GROK: Call it whatever you want, just get me some water!
MANA: Okay, already!
GROK: And more flower! I need more flower!
MANA: I’m moving as fast as I can.
(SFX: shuffing, creaking)
GROK: Why are you all bent over like that? Your back looks broken.
MANA: I call it a “window’s hump.”
GROK: How can it be a “window’s hump”? I feel awful, but I’m not dead.
MANA: No. But if you bring home any more of this bird food, I’m pretty sure I’m going to club you.