Here’s why it’s important to teach your kids about good nutrition while they’re still young:
My wife is in Chicago to attend a funeral and then spend a couple of days with her family. This means it’s now my job to make breakfast for the girls, pack their lunches for school, and cook dinner when they get home.
Perhaps believing I was on the verge of cracking under the pressure, my daughter Sara informed me yesterday that if I happen to drop dead while Mommy is gone, she’s perfectly capable of feeding herself and her little sister and getting them off to school.
She explained that she knows she’s not allowed to use the gas stove to fry eggs, but there’s plenty of sausage in the freezer, so she’ll just microwave some links each morning. She promised to pack lunches including turkey or ham slices, nuts, cheese sticks, and apple slices. If need be, they could eat the same combination for dinner after the school bus brings them home, or perhaps put more sausages in the microwave.
She’s willing to do all this, you understand, even though the easy solution would be to simply remove $20 from my wallet and buy the sugar-and-starch-laden meals served by the school cafeteria every day until my wife returns home.
At no point in her detailed explanation of how she’d maintain a good diet in the event of my sudden death did she mention anything about calling 9-1-1 to consult with professionals who could confirm that I’m actually dead and not just, say, in a bit of a coma. So apparently, she would be stepping around my body to prepare high-protein, low-carbohydrate meals for herself and her sister.
“Sara, what’s wrong with Daddy?”
“I don’t know. I think he might be dead. Do you want Swiss or cheddar on your turkey rollup?”
Whether I was in the next world or clinging ever-so-slightly to this one, I would of course be proud she wasn’t using my unfortunate fate as an excuse to indulge in sugar and starch. That’s why you have to teach ‘em young.